On the journey of self-improvement, Social Circle & Accountability play a major role. It is very interesting how big of a difference these both make, especially when intertwined. In my eyes, your social circle consists of two tiers. The first is your close friends. They are the brothers to me that I share my goals with. They are the ones that will keep you accountable. The second tier is the bigger picture. It is everyone you know. In Joe 6-pack (Sorry, had to make a Sarah Palin reference) terms, it would be your acquaintances. You could also refer to your social circle as inner and outer. For me personally, I would not be where I am now without the support of my inner social circle, and their ability to keep me accountable. When I first got in this lifestyle change, I joined the local lair. Soon after this, we went on a trip to Edmonton, and had a fucking blast. Everyone bonded. Within 2 weeks I had moved into one of the guys houses. This house later would be dubbed ‘Project Calgary’ by many.
I noticed that while I was changing rapidly, so was my social circle. I no longer had interest hanging out with the guys/girls I used to. We had different realities now. I was not the same person, nor did I have the same goals. Activities that never bothered me, did now. Soon, I had a totally new group of friends, some close, some I even call family.
To give some history on the house:
- I moved in during the month of February. That brought the total to two.
- By March we had a total of 4.
- By August we had a total of 6.
- All males.
When one particular (the 4th) individual was about to move in, this was a big decision for the house. Everyone was a bit nervous as the individual’s personality was confrontational, and he was messy. When he moved in, we quickly realized it was no problem. We were all there for the same purpose, and had like-minded goals.
The issue arose when the 5th person moved in. He was the house owners high school best friend. He was chode. Up until that point, everyone in the house went out, and was actively working on themselves. Nobody let anyone get away with slacking off. We had each others back. The problem that happened was this new individual did not have like-minded goals, nor the inner drive to get out and act. He talked a lot. He sat at home a lot. I no longer had those types of people around myself – he started to drive everyone crazy.
Only a few months later and the arguing, etc had pushed everyone over their limits, the house was gone. Looking back at what happened was this: When everybody in the house had like-minded goals, the house was able to look past the smaller issues that happened (due to personalities, etc). We saw the bigger picture. When the 5th roommate moved in, he off-set the chemistry in the house, and due to the house no longer having like-minded goals, the small issues that were looked past prior, came to the forefront, and everyone began to bicker. Eventually leading to the demise.
I was very nervous when I was moving out of the house, because the house had been so good for me. Without the house, I doubt I would be at the phase I am. The house forced me to push myself. The house kept me accountable. I couldn’t get away with any bullshit. I am glad throughout my time at the house I was able to form my social circle into a larger group of guys, so even now when I only have 1 roommate, I am still held accountable.
Now, do like-minded goals mean they have to be the SAME goals!? Hell no. The difference is, that the people you want to surround yourself with are similar in the aspect that they are ambitious. They have desire, motivation, and committment. They don’t talk the talk, they walk the walk. They are motivated.
I can’t stress that enough. I am fortunate to have the best group of guys around me. I am extremely thankful for each and every one of them.
Humbled.
-Elektro
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